I've been ignoring the General Election in the hope it might go away. Sadly, this didn't work. So now we've had it, almost all the results are in, and what have we achieved?
Nothing.
This was a wonderful opportunity to get rid of one of the most unpopular and mistrusted prime ministers in history. I'll grant you the alternatives weren't all that wonderful, but frankly a left-handed dyslexic gibbon could do a better job than Tony Blair and the seven dwarves. It wasn't a democratic process at all, as the three main parties are virtually indistinguishable. But we did have a real choice - do we want Tony Blair or not? And boy, did we blow it!
The other parties and even some Labour politicians are talking about the result being "a slap in the face for Tony Blair", or "a short sharp shock", but we all know he'll take no notice. Snug behind a still comfortable majority he'll carry on doing what he has planned all along: to mould us all into a society of politically-correct, non-smoking, non-drinking wimps who are kind to animals, generous and forgiving to criminals (especially those from Eastern Europe), happy to pay enormous taxes and social security but still buy our own pensions and pay for our own health care and everyone else's, put up with railways that charge the highest fares in Europe and can't provide a reliable service from one week's end to the next, contentedly pay congestion charges and road tolls to use the roads that were built for us with our own money, send our children to schools where violence and mayhem are a daily occurrence and wait four years for a major operation.
Dear God, this used to be a country you could be proud of. There was a time when it was a commonplace to say "an Englishman's word is his bond", or "an Englishman's home is his castle", when you got what you paid for, when we strutted our stuff on the world stage with our heads held high because we knew we were acting honourably, when British grit and determination held the might of the Third Reich at bay when the rest of Europe crumbled. Now we're a country that people want to leave. More people go to live abroad each year than all the immigrants and asylum seekers coming in, and who can blame them?
It's very hard to see what the voters were thinking of. They say that a nation gets the government it deserves, and by that token we must be a very sad bunch indeed. Still, if that's what we wanted, that's what we got: our march to mediocrity goes on unchecked, and Tony-baby can resume his rightful place in the world - up George Dubblew's arse.
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