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11th September 2013: The world's gone mad and I'm the only one who knows
13th August 2013: Black is white. Fact. End of.
11th August 2013: Electric cars, not as green as they're painted?
18th June 2013: Wrinklies unite, you have nothing to lose but your walking frames!
17th May 2013: Some actual FACTS about climate change (for a change) from actual scientists ...
10th May 2013: An article about that poison gas, carbon dioxide, and other scientific facts (not) ...
10th May 2013: We need to see past the sex and look at the crimes: is justice being served?
8th May 2013: So, who would you trust to treat your haemorrhoids, Theresa May?
8th May 2013: Why should citizens in the 21st Century fear the law so much?
30th April 2013: What the GOS says today, the rest of the world realises tomorrow ...
30th April 2013: You couldn't make it up, could you? Luckily you don't need to ...
29th April 2013: a vote for NONE OF THE ABOVE, because THE ABOVE are crap ...
28th April 2013: what goes around, comes around?
19th April 2013: everyone's a victim these days ...
10th April 2013: Thatcher is dead; long live Thatcher!
8th April 2013: Poor people are such a nuisance. Just give them loads of money and they'll go away ...
26th March 2013: Censorship is alive and well and coming for you ...
25th March 2013: Just do your job properly, is that too much to ask?
25th March 2013: So, what do you think caused your heterosexuality?
20th March 2013: Feminists - puritans, hypocrites or just plain stupid?
18th March 2013: How Nazi Germany paved the way for modern governance?
13th March 2013: Time we all grew up and lived in the real world ...
12th March 2013: Hindenburg crash mystery solved? - don't you believe it!
6th March 2013: Is this the real GOS?
5th March 2013: All that's wrong with taxes
25th February 2013: The self-seeking MP who is trying to bring Britain down ...
24th February 2013: Why can't newspapers just tell the truth?
22nd February 2013: Trial by jury - a radical proposal
13th February 2013: A little verse for two very old people ...
6th February 2013: It's not us after all, it's worms
6th February 2013: Now here's a powerful argument FOR gay marriage ...
4th February 2013: There's no such thing as equality because we're not all the same ...
28th January 2013: Global Warming isn't over - IT'S HIDING!
25th January 2013: Global Warmers: mad, bad and dangerous to know ...
25th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
19th January 2013: We STILL haven't got our heads straight about gays ...
16th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
11th January 2013: What it's like being English ...
7th January 2013: Bleat, bleat, if it saves the life of just one child ...
7th January 2013: How best to put it? 'Up yours, Argentina'?
7th January 2013: Chucking even more of other people's money around ...
6th January 2013: Chucking other people's money around ...
30th December 2012: The BBC is just crap, basically ...
30th December 2012: We mourn the passing of a genuine Grumpy Old Sod ...
30th December 2012: How an official body sets out to ruin Christmas ...
16th December 2012: Why should we pardon Alan Turing when he did nothing wrong?
15th December 2012: When will social workers face up to their REAL responsibility?
15th December 2012: Unfair trading by a firm in Bognor Regis ...
14th December 2012: Now the company that sells your data is pretending to act as watchdog ...
7th December 2012: There's a war between cars and bikes, apparently, and  most of us never noticed!
26th November 2012: The bottom line - social workers are just plain stupid ...
20th November 2012: So, David Eyke was right all along, then?
15th November 2012: MPs don't mind dishing it out, but when it's them in the firing line ...
14th November 2012: The BBC has a policy, it seems, about which truths it wants to tell ...
12th November 2012: Big Brother, coming to a school near you ...
9th November 2012: Yet another celebrity who thinks, like Jimmy Saville, that he can behave just as he likes because he's famous ...
5th November 2012: Whose roads are they, anyway? After all, we paid for them ...
7th May 2012: How politicians could end droughts at a stroke if they chose ...
6th May 2012: The BBC, still determined to keep us in a fog of ignorance ...
2nd May 2012: A sense of proportion lacking?
24th April 2012: Told you so, told you so, told you so ...
15th April 2012: Aah, sweet ickle polar bears in danger, aah ...
15th April 2012: An open letter to Anglian Water ...
30th March 2012: Now they want to cure us if we don't believe their lies ...
28th February 2012: Just how useful is a degree? Not very.
27th February 2012: ... so many ways to die ...
15th February 2012: DO go to Jamaica because you definitely WON'T get murdered with a machete. Ms Fox says so ...
31st January 2012: We don't make anything any more
27th January 2012: There's always a word for it, they say, and if there isn't we'll invent one
26th January 2012: Literary criticism on GOS? How posh!
12th December 2011: Plain speaking by a scientist about the global warming fraud
9th December 2011: Who trusts scientists? Apart from the BBC, of course?
7th December 2011: All in all, not a good week for British justice ...
9th November 2011: Well what d'you know, the law really IS a bit of an ass ...


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Quoted by "Peterborough" in the Daily Mail recently, these extracts from medical notes written by Glasgow doctors ...
• The patient has no previous history of suicides
• Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital
• Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40lb weight gain the last three days
• She has no rigors or shaking chills but her husband states that she was very hot in bed last night
• Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year
• On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared
• The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed
• The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993
• Discharge status: alive, but without my permission
• Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful
• Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch
• She is numb from her toes down
• While in ER she was examined, X-rated and sent home
• The skin was moist and dry
• Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches
• Patient was alert and unresponsive
• Rectal examination revealed a normal-sized thyroid
• She stated that she had been constipated most of her life until she got a divorce
• Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation
• Examination of the genitalia revealed that he is circus sized
• The lab test indicated abnormal lover function
• Skin: somewhat pale but present
• The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor
• Large brown stool ambulating in the hall
• Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
• When she fainted, her eyes rolled round the room
• The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed
• Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant
• She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December
• Patient was seen in consultation by Dr.Smith, who felt we should sit on the abdomen, and I agree
• The patient was to have a bowel resection. However he took a job as a stockbroker instead
• By the time he was admitted his rapid heart had stopped and he was feeling better
... and a reader's letter to the same paper quotes an extract from Stephen Pollard's biography of David Blunkett ...
After winning the 2001 election, Labour's senior ministers went to Buckingham Palace to receive their seals of office. One of those present said "We were dead on our feet after campaigning for three weeks ... John Prescott knelt, recited his oath and walked away leaving the Queen still holding his seals of office. Jack Straw mangled his oath ... then steered blind David Blunkett towards the Queen.
Blunkett ended up facing not the Queen but a statue of George IV, to which he addressed his oath.
At the end of the shambolic series of events, the Queen said "I hope you run the country better than you have managed over the last 15 minutes!"


The GOS says: No comment from me, I think ...

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