You've got to admit that Muslim leaders show remarkable consistency, even those who aren't actually rabid hate-mongers - they can always be relied upon to make just one more ridiculous and unreasonable demand, and to expect the rest of us to take them seriously.
The Muslim Council of Britain has published a 72-page booklet of what they euphemistically call "guidance" for schools, aiming to ensure that schools meet the so-called needs of Muslim pupils even if this is to the detriment of children of other faiths.
Among the points of "guidance" are topics like sex education, Ramadan and halal meals. Girls should be allowed to wear the headscarf in all lessons, including PE. Boys must be allowed to grow beards. Girls must wear full-length skirts, and during PE lessons both girls and boys must wear tracksuits.
The MCB says the concept of "haya" or modesty must be respected by teachers and school staff. "In principle," the say, "the dress for both boys and girls should be modest and neither tight-fitting nor transparent and not accentuate the body shape."
The guidance criticises the "vast majority" of primary schools for asking boys and girls to change in mixed groups. "Muslim children are likely to exhibit resistance to this sort of compromising and immodest exposure, but are often pressurised to conform to institutional norms which do not take account of their own or their parents' beliefs and values," it says. Communal showering in particular involves "profound indignity".
Muslim pupils should be allowed to sit out of dance lessons, despite the fact that these are required by the National Curriculum for PE. The booklet says "Muslims consider that most dance activities, as practised in the curriculum, are not consistent with the Islamic requirements for modesty as they may involve sexual connotations and messages". Interesting turn of phrase here - "as practised in the curriculum". So most Muslims are experts on educational dance all of a sudden? How the hell do they know what goes on in the classroom - have they seen it? I don't think so. I mean, it's sinful, isn't it? Or perhaps it's OK for them to get their jollies by watching children dancing, provided it's only kufr girls? No, that can't be it. That would make them dirty-minded hypocrites.
Schools are urged to be particularly aware of the needs of Muslim pupils during Ramadan, the month of fasting. They should avoid scheduling exams during Ramadan and should refrain from sex education, as Muslims should avoid sexual thoughts and discourse at this time. Swimming lessons may also be problematic as there is a risk of swallowing water and breaking the fast. God, you couldn't make it up, could you?
MCB secretary general Muhammad Abdul Bari said "We are convinced that with a reasonable degree of mutual understanding and goodwill, even more progress can be made." That'll be everybody else mutually understanding the Muslim viewpoint, presumably, rather than vice versa?
So far schools don't look as though they're going to take the guidance too seriously, we're glad to say. The general secretary of the National Association of Head Teachers, Mick Brookes, said: "Schools are trying to create societies within their walls which are tolerant and celebratory. I just worry that if the list of demands - if it is a list of demands - is too much, that it will simply create a backlash."
A spokesman for the Department for Education said: "This is not official guidance and is not endorsed by the government, nor does it have any binding power whatsoever on schools as some hysterical headlines claim. The Department for Education and Skills has no involvement with the document produced by the MCB."
Jolly good. Very glad to hear it. The worry is not so much that schools might be foolish and weak-minded enough to take this rubbish seriously. It's more a question of what the Muslims will demand next. Mark our words, it won't be long before they start to worry about non-Muslim pupils wearing clothes that aren't "modest" or that are "tight-fitting" or "transparent" or that "accentuate the body-shape". And this isn't silly - leotards are common enough in schools, and they certainly accentuate the body-shape. And just see what the kids wear for the average school show!
It stands to reason that if clothes like this are contrary to Muslim standards of decency, then it must be offensive for Muslim pupils to see those clothes on others. And if dance is likely to "involve sexual connotations and messages" then presumably they won't want to be exposed to it when it's performed by their classmates, will they?
Then again, if Muslim pupils can't do exams or have sex education during Ramadan, the timetabling requirements of most schools will mean that no-one can do those things - you can't have one timetable for Muslims and one for everyone else. There aren't enough teachers, or rooms.
Just who the hell do these sad, humourless, ignorant jackasses think they are, trying to make the rest of us alter our ways to fit in with them? Why the hell should we give a toss about the requirements of their deluded religion? And if their so-called "culture" is obviously backward and moronic (and nobody can convince me that any religion that requires female circumcision is anything but Neanderthal and abhorrent*) why should we give it a moment's consideration?
Make no mistake about it, this "guidance" must be ruled right out of court, it must be laughed out of countenance, put out to grass, kicked into touch, knocked off the pitch, given the red card and any other sporting metaphor you can think of. If it's seen to be taken even the tiniest bit seriously, it'll only be a couple of years before the tail will be wagging the dog in no uncertain fashion.
* and it does, in case anyone's heard different. It may not be mentioned in the Koran, but "The Reliance of the Traveller", a classic manual of Islamic sacred law, states that circumcision is "obligatory for both men and women." Many Islamic clerics view it as essential and tirelessly promote the procedure. When Egyptian health authorities attempted to ban female circumcision in 1995, they met major opposition from Islamic clerics and Sheikh Yussuf el-Badry, in an attempt to establish Islamic Sharia law, sued the health agency for ordering the ban. Eventually, Egyptian authorities overturned the ban and legalized the practice. El Badry claimed this as a major victory for Islam.
And don't go thinking that this doesn't apply here, and Egypt is a nice long way away. That's the whole point, isn't it - an alien culture has imported itself. We're being colonised. It has a certain poetic justice, I suppose. We spent most of the 18th and 19th Centuries doing to same thing to other people. The cultural thing, I mean, and the bullying. I don't think we actually cut their willies off.
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