Our Wanker of the Week is Andrea Scott who works for Age Concern in Barnstaple.
70-year-old Elaine Richards, a retired district nurse, has a 96-year-old friend who attends an Age Concern day centre in Barnstaple. As it was his birthday, she made a cake for him to share with his friends at the centre. Like you do, you know?
The centre banned it.
Andrea Scott from Age Concern decided that only a shop-bought cake would be acceptable. She said "If I let one person do this, it will open the floodgates. We don't know where these cakes come from, but if something went wrong then we could be sued".
So to be fair, Andrea Scott wasn't casting any doubt on Elaine's cookery skills or the cleanliness of her kitchen. It was all about having someone to blame.
But actually, that's worse, isn't it? Elaine's elderly friend was born before the discovery of antibiotics, he survived the Depression and two World Wars, and now the poor old sod finds himself living in a society where petty officials put guarding their own backs before good manners, quality, skill, experience, common-sense or kindness.
Elaine is a member of the Barnstaple WI, and traditionally the WI know a thing or two about cake-making. Her cake contained 9oz. of flour, 6oz. of unsalted butter, 6oz. of sugar, milk, three eggs, some candied peel and zest of lemon. Pretty dangerous stuff, eh?
Age Concern's preferred shop cake is likely to contain wheat flour, dried egg white, sugar, vegetable margarine, hydrogenated vegetable oil, water, salt, emulsifier E475, colours E100 & E106B, flavourings, glucose-fructose syrup, humectant, vegetable glycerine, emulsifier E471, dried egg yolk, baking powder, raising agents, colour E170, invert sugar syrup, skimmed milk powder, preservatives E202& E200, more flavourings, soya, stabiliser E415 and more colours E104 & E124.
Go on then, which would you rather eat?
Andrea Scott, for not knowing something everybody knows, and still being prepared to pontificate about it, you are our Wanker of the Week. Enjoy. You can have a cup of tea with your colleagues and laugh about it. You could even have some cakes - but make sure they come from a shop. You never know … there are some pretty sinister old ladies out there …
either on this site or on the World Wide Web.
This site created and maintained by PlainSite