While we are sad to see the end of David Onamade's reign as Wanker of the Week - because he is probably the biggest tosser we have featured in these pages since the award began - we do have a worthy replacement.
Our Wankers this week are the Trading Standards Officers of Powys County Council. They have homed in on Jo Carthew who runs the three-worker family business, Black Mountains Smokery in Crickhowell, which makes 200,000 sausages a year.
One of Jo's best-sellers is the Welsh Dragon Sausage. The Trading Standards Officers have tested these sausages and found that surprisingly, they do not contain any dragon meat. What they do contain is pork - and it says so clearly on the label. But they've decided this means Jo is contravening the draconian ("draconian" - get it?) rules about food labelling, and have told Jo to re-name his sausages "Welsh Dragon Pork Sausages" - begging the question, if dragon meat doesn't exist, what the hell is "dragon pork"?
A Powys County Council spokesman said, 'The product 'Welsh Dragon Sausage' was not sufficiently precise to inform a purchaser of the true nature of the food. I don't think anyone would imagine that dragon meat was being used but we would not want vegetarians to buy the sausages believing they were meat free".
Nice one, Powys County Council. All the vegetarians we know can read food-labels perfectly well, so for assuming that they're as dense as you are yourselves, you are our "Wankers of the Week". Congratulations.
The GOS says: An update to this story revealed today. According to newspaper reports, Trading Standards Officers across the country are planning to follow the example set by Powys County Council and take action against a number of food manufacturers who are misleading the public. These are said to include …
… "jelly-babies" will have to be re-labelled unless they contain at least 50% real baby ...
… "fish fingers" will be banned unless manufacturers can demonstrate that fish do actually have fingers ...
… in addition to their false labelling, Bird's Eye and other manufacturers of "battered cod" face prosecution for cruelty to animals (well, fish) ...
… Messrs.Fox's will have to re-name their famous mints which do not contain any actual glacier ...
… wine gums will have to be at least 10% proof ...
… and then there's "spotted dick" …
either on this site or on the World Wide Web.
This site created and maintained by PlainSite