Our Wanker this Week is one Margaret Devonshire who lives at Pickering in Yorkshire.
Every year the North Yorkshire Moors Railway - a well-known preserved steam railway - organises a "Railway at War" weekend. Special trains are run, war-enactment enthusiasts and local people rub khaki shoulders in the streets, there are preserved army vehicles, air-raid shelters, NAAFI canteens - for anyone remotely interested in our history, in the lives of our fathers and grandfathers, or in one of the most vivid and perilous times in the story of this nation, it's a lot of fun.
For the railway and the town of Pickering it's also a grand opportunity to do some real business. And why not?
Well, the why not is, according to Ms.Devonshire who has complained to the police and the local council, that some people carry de-activated guns during the weekend, and this might enable a terrorist to dress up as a lieutenant-colonel of the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders, conceal himself in the crowd, and suddenly let rip with his trusty Lee-Enfield. Yeah, like that's going to happen.
Ms.Devonshire told the Pickering Gazette and Herald "The council allows people to roam the streets of Pickering during the war weekend, holding guns. In this day and age when you can't tell the difference between a real and a replica gun, it should not be allowed and the council should ban them. With all the shootings and killings in this country, we should be thinking of our own youngsters and trying to protect them. I am not a fanatic, but someone who totally dislikes guns and the danger they bring, and I object to them on the streets of Pickering for any reason. I want Pickering to be a safe town to live in and not one where people can carry guns. Can you imagine how easy it would be for a 'nutter' to wander around our streets with a gun and end up shooting someone because he was able to carry a real gun, everyone thinking it was a replica?"
Sadly in this day and age it's only necessary for one sad, humourless, self-righteous prig to voice such a concern and, ludicrous as it obviously is, plenty of others will bend over backwards to be seen to be equally "responsible". Former mayor Councillor Margaret Lowe said "We take such a lot on trust. We have thousands of visitors come into Pickering for the weekend. Such an incident could happen", while the current mayor, Councillor Julie Hepworth, went further: "We should probably stop and think about this. We are seeing young people dying on our streets".
In Pickering, Councillor Hepworth? I don't think you are!
Strangely there are already some PC restrictions in force at the weekend: German uniforms are banned.
So the situation looks decidedly dodgy for this splendid event, and the lady wot dun it is Margaret Devonshire, may her feet rot and her dugs grow inward. There are a few stalwart voices talking common-sense still: one councillor (a man, needless to say) pointed out that cutlasses are used during a seafaring festival in Whitby, and that the famous Sealed Knot battle re-enactment group use muskets and pikes. And a local policeman said "The issue of the de-activated weapons has been broached on numerous occasions and we are normally given due notice that the relevant people will be carrying them. There are no offences being committed".
But common-sense isn't going to be the issue, is it? We know from bitter experience that once these self-righteous nazis get an idea into their heads they are not to be dissuaded by something so irrelevant as rational argument, and will just keep banging on until they can bend everyone about them to their own narrow will.
So, Ms.Devonshire, you unpleasant bully, you are our Wanker of the Week. That's not very PC of you, is it? I should complain, if I were you.
Like many other newspapers the Pickering Gazette and Herald invites readers to post their comments on its website. Some of the good residents of Pickering have expressed themselves with typical Yorkshire pith, if you'll forgive the expression …
How about you keep your namby pamby PC thoughts to yourself Miss Devonshire? - PC Plod
Disgusting - these men remember the sacrifices of our fallen fathers and grand fathers who died protecting us from the very kind of oppression that these fools want us to be rid of under the guise of political correctness. We must stop pandering to the minority of fools who always seem to shout loudest - Ben Heyman
My dad's got a Mondeo, and that's far more dangerous than any de-activated weapon - nickthebassist
Miss Devonshire appears to be an imbecile - Douglas.
The woman's a barking nutcase - M Johnson
This country is going down the drain, and ideas such as this one are not helping - Martin Holt
Many people have fought and died so that you could have your democratic right to air your views, Margaret Devonshire. How dare you besmirch these honourable people with your pernicious opinions. I despise PC do-gooders like you - Colin Greenaway .
Margaret, you great big, soft, sissy, girly, nancy, French, bender, Man United supportin' loon - DCI Gene Hunt
If you can't trust me with a gun during Peace, don't try and give me one during War! - Longshanks
Why would anyone bother to dress up in camouflage if they intend to shoot the town up? Scaremongering old biddy - Michael Ryan
Judging by the description, Miss Devonshire would appear to be an ageing spinster. I would imagine that the rifling on her Lee-Enfield has become rather dry and dusty as it probably hasn't been used since armistice day. I would recommend she acquire a good rod tip and use it to give her bore a thorough clean and oiling. Maybe then she will find renewed joy in her own life and no longer feel the need to poke her beak into others - Bob DeBilde
Well the silly old biddy has spoiled it for me - local loony
Re Ms Devonshire: I don't think both her paddles are in the water - Andy
What the hell is this country coming to? I can tell you now, if I wanted to go out and shoot people I wouldn't put on a uniform from 60 years ago, I'd just do it. GOD if my Great Grandad could see what you just said he'd turn in his grave. He gave 6 years of his life to keep you free. People like you do not deserve it! - Andy W
Tell you what, there are now so many events in the WW2 Living History Calendar, we'll just go elsewhere. Quite happy to make money out of all the re-enactors but not that worried about safety that the main street is clogged to worrying levels, with no police or first aiders - Kate
These are the sort of people who wish to forget that young men and women gave and continue giving their lives for their freedom. When will these … idiots realise that it's not re-enactors and hobbyists that cause crime. The present generation of do-gooders have spent too long removing all levels of discipline from schools and are now reaping what they have sown - Ben Robertson
You can see some pictures of the Pickering War Weekend here.
either on this site or on the World Wide Web.
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